Human of The Year

Let me tell you why I won Human of the Year

I won because people believe I am a good man

A man with integrity and merit.

I’m the principal of your child’s school

The one responsible for their growth and education

I am the man who sits next to you at church

and smiles as if I am God’s best friend.

I am the man who house sits for free when you’re on vacation

The man who mows your lawn

when you’re too sick to do it yourself

I am the man who smiles at the woman  

shunned by the town for sleeping around.

I am the man who volunteers every week

The man everyone deemed worthy of an award

that holds much more prestige than I deserve.

I am the man who won Human of the Year.

I’m also the man that gets plastered every night

to forget the terrible things I’ve done

The man who gets a little too close

to a woman shunned for adultery.

I am the man who tried to drive home drunk

The man who hit the little boy on his bike

I am the man who covered up this accident

The man who is head of his search party

I am the man so guilt ridden he can hardly move.

The man everyone thinks they know.

I am the man who won Human of the Year.

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